Forever May Not be Long Enough
by quixotic-hope
Summary: Oneshot. HPSS. Repost. Harry and Severus must deal with a fatal disease. Character death.


**Title: **Forever May Not Be Long Enough

**Author: **quixotichope

**Pairing: **Harry/Severus

**Rating: **R

**Disclaimer: **Harry Potter and his universe belong to JK Rowling. This song belongs to Live.

**Summary: **Response to Madame Vamp's Song Lyric Challenge. They say love heals all things. Harry and Severus put that to the test.

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) live  
(slash) forevermaynotbelongenough (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

The first time we made love was the night before the final battle. I had been so sure that I was going to die the next day that I no longer feared what was sure to be Severus's rejection. I mean, even if he was as disgusted with me as I though he'd be, at least I wouldn't have to live with the hurt long. And, on the tiniest, hardly-there-at-all chance that he liked me back, or was really desperate, at least I'd get one night with him. That was enough for me. Or so I thought.

The greatest surprise of my life came when Severus agreed to the sex. He didn't say that he loved me, but his gentle touches and the way that he held me in his arms afterwards expressed what words never could. He made love to me that night; he didn't fuck me. Although I had never had sex before that night, I knew there was a difference. And I knew that if I died the next day, like I knew I most likely would, I would die the happiest man on earth because I had had one night with this man.

The second greatest surprise of my life came when I woke up in the hospital wing three days later with Severus Snape scrunched up in a chair next to my bed, his head resting on the back of the chair. At that moment, with the blurry memories of the battle still flashing around in my head, the sight of Severus waiting for me to wake up was the most beautiful, breath taking sight I had ever seen.

Of course, Madame Pomfrey, using her sixth sense to determine that I had rejoined the land of the living, came bustling over not three seconds later, causing Severus to jump up from his chair with his wand drawn, ready to curse whomever had decided to startle him. Smiling at the protectiveness I could see in his eyes, I allowed the nurse to check me over. When she was gone Severus sat down at the side of my bed and held my hand. As he gently ran his hand across my cheek, I knew that I would spend the rest of my life with this man.

_  
_ The next month I graduated from Hogwarts, and Severus gave Albus his resignation. He said that the castle was starting to make him ill. With his being the last Snape and my being the last Potter, the two of us had enough money to move into Snape Manor and not have to work a day for the rest of our lives. We spent the summer cleaning the house, turning it into our home. We argued about what color to paint some of the rooms. When he let me paint the living room in various shades of red and gold, I knew that he loved me more than words could ever tell.

Over the next few weeks I learned that he was serious when he said that the castle was making him ill. He had started to look thin before we left. Now he was losing even more weight and was starting to get stomach pains. Not that he would ever admit to me that he was suffering, but I could tell. The way his eyes would close sharply and all movements would still for a moment was a dead giveaway. I begged him to see Madame Pomfrey. He insisted that he was fine. When he started having difficulty swallowing and developed a cough that never seemed to go away, I told him that I would never sleep with him again unless he went and had Madame Pomfrey check him out. After spending the next month on a couch looking at four very red walls, Severus realized that I was serious and sought out Madame Pomfrey. When her eyes filled with tears, I knew something was really wrong. __

Mesothelioma. Cancer. Severus had cancer. He lived through Death Eaters, and Voldemort, and the vindictive sons-of-bitches that ran the Ministry of Magic, and now he had the deadliest form of Muggle cancer? A cancer that you get from coming in contact with toxic chemicals? I would have laughed at the irony of it all if it didn't feel as if my heart was going to stop beating at any given moment. How could Severus get cancer? And how could magic, in its infinite superiority to the ways of Muggles, not cure him?

Madame Pomfrey explained that by the time Severus showed symptoms, it was too late to cure him. He could undergo chemotherapy, but Madame Pomfrey said that wizards have even worse reactions to it than Muggles do. Severus refused. He said he wanted to spend the last of his days at home with me.

As I looked down at the tombstone of the only man I had ever loved, the only man who had ever loved me, I knew that I wouldn't be able to live without him.

_  
_ I tried to go on with my life. Honest, I did. But when you spend your whole life yearning to feel loved and finally find someone who loves you, you don't want to give that up. You can't give that up. I know some will say that I took the coward's way out. Maybe I did. All I know is that I am nothing without Severus Snape.

_  
_ Severus was waiting for me on the other side. He scowled when he saw me, and at first I thought he was going to walk off and leave me there. But then he smiled, the first smile I had seen on his face since before he got sick. He pulled me to his chest and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. My arms tightened around his neck as I leaned up to kiss him. Smiling, we pulled apart. We would now be able to be with each other forever.

And, as Severus whispered the words "I love you," to me for the first time, I knew that forever would never be long enough.

**Author's Note: Please review and tell me what you think! Also, if you leave your email I will be glad to respond to your review personally. **


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